Chrissy Teigen revealed she has fallen off the wagon and started drinking again, more than four years after she initially got sober.

She announced her decision to quit alcohol in December 2020, after ‘my doctor and friend’ sent her a book on sobriety as a birthday gift the previous month.

‘I was done with making an a** of myself in front of people (I’m still embarrassed), tired of day drinking and feeling like s*** by 6, not being able to sleep,’ she said then.

Her decision to stop drinking came in the immediate aftermath of her cyberbullying scandal, in which she was accused of having told the then-teenage Courtney Stodden over private message to commit suicide.

Now, however, she has revealed that she relapsed into alcohol, candidly confessing: ‘The truth is, I don’t know what I’m doing.’

The 39-year-old wife of John Legend went public with the development while promoting her upcoming podcast episode interviewing Holly Whitaker, the author of the book Quit Like A Woman that helped Chrissy dry out in the first place.

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Chrissy Teigen revealed she has fallen off the wagon and started drinking again, more than four years after she initially got sober; pictured in 2020

‘Holly Whitaker changed my life, changed my perspective and changed how I view the f***ing beast that is alcohol. But to have to admit to all of you: I let it back into my life. to let a lot of you down, oh I feel it deeply,’ Chrissy wrote.

‘I was so proud every time one of you told me on the street that holly and I made you want to rethink drinking, reframe drinking. I still am. The truth is, I don’t know what I’m doing,’ admitted the influencer, who has four children with Jonn.

‘I one hundred percent know I like me better sober. I one hundred percent know I get more done, I absolutely feel better in my body without it. And I am one hundred percent pissed that I can’t be normal and have a cocktail with my husband on vacay without it turning into 8 and feeling like s***.’

Chrissy declared that she was ‘tired of throwing up on a Tuesday’ and no longer wants to ‘feel like I need a shot to talk to a crowd. I hate that the thought of maybe having a drink can consume me some days.’

She acknowledged to her more than 40 million followers: ‘So your rational mind is probably like “OK THEN STOP, BITCH!” and god, do I f***ing AGREE! All I know is my relationship with the whole process of sobriety (and messing up) has changed for the better. I am deeply aware of where this can go if I let it.’

Letting fans into her current thought process, she explained that her ‘plan right now is to continue to be mindful with’ her sobriety.

‘I can go to a concert sober and have the greatest time ever. I can avoid absinthe at the Ren Faire and be so abbbbsolutely full of joy. Photos of my kid’s birthday parties are no longer me with bleary, sleepy drinking eyes. And I am proud of that.’

She allowed: ‘But I still know my relationship with alcohol just isn’t normal and never will be. Thank you for allowing me to figure it out openly in front of you all. Anyhow. This is for all the people who are figuring it out. And to the sober community, god I am still so, so proud of you. Until we meet again.’

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Chrissy is promoting her upcoming podcast episode interviewing Holly Whitaker, the author of the book Quit Like A Woman that helped Chrissy dry out in the first place

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She announced her decision to quit alcohol in December 2020, after ‘my doctor and friend’ sent her a book on sobriety as a birthday gift the previous month; pictured 2017

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Chrissy has four children with her pop star husband John Legend, with whom she is pictured attending the fourth annual Gold Gala this month

Chrissy came to the decision to give up drinking in December 2020, announcing the move on New Year’s Eve and beginning her sobriety the following year.

After experiencing ‘a few (wine) hiccups in the road,’ she told fans in July 2022 that she had ‘finally’ managed to complete a full year sober.

‘I miss feeling loopy and carefree sometimes, but to be honest toward the end, it didn’t give that fun feeling anymore anyhow,’ Chrissy shared.

She explained that she ‘drank to end crazy anxiety that later mostly went away when I – get this – quit drinking! sigh. anyhow I feel really good.’

Chrissy admitted that ‘sometimes I get really frustrated looking back on days I should remember way better than I do because of alcohol.’

An example thereof was when she ‘drank cafe patron and fell asleep while an Outback Steakhouse chef taught me (my friends) how to make a bloomin onion at my house. I wish I was awake for that. Wish I remembered really any awards show lol.’

The model shared: ‘There are pictures from huge moments in life where my eyes just look…gone. Some are from real work shoots, some just beach days with the family.’

She added: ‘While I honestly STILL don’t know if I’ll never have a drink again, I do know I never want to be that way again. And for now, none is best. I’ll let the bad dreams come up and try to sort them out in therapy, without booze. Prayers for a blooming onion redo, @outback?’